The stronger the relationship you have with someone, the greater your chances of winning their heart.

Connect with people on a personal level.

Abraham Lincoln once said, “If you would win a man to your cause, first convince him that you are his sincere friend. Show him that you are his best friend, and then he will follow you.”

You must take interest in your team members by spending time with them and talking with them. You are not there to create problems for them but to help them solve theirs—this is what makes you a leader and places you above them. You must be “the friend.”

A leader must touch the heart before asking for the hand.

Seek to reach their hearts by showing interest in their family life, emotional well-being, personal and professional lives. Don’t be the type of leader who constantly assigns tasks without reciprocation. You must do more for them than they do for you. This is called the emotional bank account—you must avoid making more withdrawals than deposits.

Someone whose heart you’ve touched will gladly offer help when you ask. That’s why it’s essential to touch the heart before asking for the hand. Napoleon I, for example, would often get close to his soldiers before sending them into battle, showing concern for their well-being and that of their families.

There’s also a story of heroism about an American soldier who, in the midst of a losing battle, insisted on rescuing two of his wounded comrades. He carried them to the helicopter for evacuation. When he reached the chopper, the surprised pilot asked, “Why did you take such a risk?” and he replied, “If it were me who was wounded, they would have done the same for me.” People are willing to do for you what they know you would do for them.

The word “servant” in English means “serviteur” in French. Literally, it is composed of “to serve” and “ant”. In this sense, a servant is one who serves the ant—a creature smaller than oneself. It implies showing humility and respect towards others, regardless of their social or professional status. As the Holy Scriptures show, even Jesus Himself served His apostles. If you aspire for your staff to serve you, set the example by serving them first.

Proverbs 27:23 (Message Version) says: “Know your sheep by name; carefully attend to your flocks.” This means knowing your staff deeply—their names and even their home situations. This inspires them to give their best for the growth of your organization. For when you touch your employees’ hearts, they will offer you their hands.

“If you aspire for your staff members to serve you, give them the example by serving them first.” — ULRICH MEHOUELLEY

This text is an excerpt from the book “BUILDING A STRONG TEAM” written by ULRICH MEHOUELLEY.

We invite you to read the next article: “TEAM EVALUATION.”

CONNECTION. CONNECTION. CONNECTION.