
LEARNING SUBMISSION.
“Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.” Ephesians 5:22
In God’s divine order, submission from a wife to her husband is a necessary requirement for making marriage work. It is also a command from God (Genesis 3:16). From Scripture, we understand that His commandments are not grievous. Sometimes, submission may appear foolish to the world, but to the believer, it is wisdom. By this, many women have won their husbands to the Lord, and several others have kept their homes from falling apart.
Submission means willingly putting oneself under the authority of another. In Ephesians 5:21-24, Apostle Paul communicates the mind of God concerning submission:
“Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.”
Single ladies, before you agree to marry any man, ensure that you are willingly ready to put yourself under his authority; else that marriage may never work. Married ladies, don’t wait for enforced submission.
Willingly put yourself under your husband’s authority. There are some key things you must understand about submission from the above scripture.
Submission Has Four Major Components: Humility, Obedience, Respect And Love.
Pride hinders so many women from submitting. Pride is destructive; it must not be harbored (1 Peter 5:5). Also, obedience and respect are principal requirements in submission, because you cannot claim to be submissive to a husband you can’t obey and respect.
It is vital to also remember that your husband needs to be loved at all times. Learn to keep showering him with love (Titus 2:4). That way, you will make your marriage work.
Your Submission Is First To God
“Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.” Ephesians 5:21
The Amplified Bible renders that last bit this way: …out of reverence for Christ (the Messiah, the Anointed One). As a believer, you must first submit to Christ, before you can successfully submit to others.
Before a woman can submit to her husband, she must first learn to submit to God. The extent to which she yields herself to God’s commandments will determine the degree to which she submits to her husband. The husband must also submit himself to God because the extent to which he submits to God will determine the degree to which his wife submits to him.
Christian women who are submissive to God are those who exalt His Word and obey its dictates. Only such women can genuinely submit to their husbands. Before your horizontal relationship (between you and your husband) can blossom, your vertical relationship (with God) must first be in place.
Submitting to God always attracts tremendous blessings. For instance, Abraham submitted to the Word of God when he went up to mount Moriah to sacrifice Isaac, and this act of obedience moved God to bless him (Genesis 22:1-17).
Jesus too forgot about the pleasures of heaven and yielded to the Father’s request. He did not consider His life, but agreed to go to cross. But with the cross came the crown, and from His sweat, sweetness came (Philippians 2:9).
When you are ready to obey God’s commandment to submit to your husband, then you are prepared to eat the good of marriage (Isaiah 1:19). Many marriages are not working today due to ignorance of this truth.
Store up God’s Word in your heart, and the Holy Spirit will always bring up an appropriate verse into your heart that will spur you to obey whenever you are expected to submit.
Secondly, ask God to create in you a willingness to submit to your spouse. You need to ask in order to receive, and He will grant you the required grace.
Submission Is A Command
God commanded the man to love his wife, and the woman to submit to his authority. It is a commandment every wife must adhere to. Failure to embrace submission as a command from God has brought so much heartaches into several homes. God, in His omniscience, knows that without this all-important ingredient, no matter how anointed the couple is, that marriage will not work.
Ephesians 5:22 clearly equates obedience to one’s husband with obedience to the Lord. In fact, it says in the Living Bible translation that the wife should submit to the husband in the same way. That is, with the same reverence with which you would treat God, you are expected to treat your own spouse. This explains why Sarah submitted so much to Abraham and called him lord. Whosoever wants to keep her soul from destruction, must determine to keep this commandment.
“He that keepeth the commandment keepeth his own soul; but he that despiseth his ways shall die.” Proverbs 19:16
When a woman willingly puts herself under the control or authority of her husband, she is obeying God’s command, and she cannot miss her reward (Proverbs 13:13).
Submission Is Of The Heart
Submission flows from the heart. Women who battle with submission do so because God’s Word has not gained entrance into their hearts. You may hear a message on submission and receive it with joy, but you need to let it sink into your heart.
Until submission takes root in your heart, it does not last. You may submit for a little while but later revert to your former rebellious ways.
Woman, make your heart tender to the Word of God, that you may enjoy the thirty, sixty and a hundredfold returns in your family (Mark 4:20). Receive the Word, keep it and work at it with patience, until your fruits begin to show. God watches the heart; so, you must keep your heart with all diligence.
The state of your heart determines the words of your mouth, rebellious thoughts lead to word and acts. Theretore, submission must be in thought, word and action.
One key you can employ to help your thought life is to watch what you spend your time reading and listening to; what you fix your eyes on and, of course, the company you keep.
You must purpose to separate from and sever all links with people and books that teach values contrary to those in the Bible. Woman, think good about your husband. Wish him well in your thoughts, for that is where submission begins!
Submission In Your Words
Submission reflects in the words you speak. How do you address your husband? Some women talk to their husbands rudely, using derogatory words. No, it’s very wrong! You can convey submission, rebellion or indifference through your choice of words. By speaking right and gracious words, you will draw your husband closer. Words can be correctly used to bring you favour with your spouse. Without doubt, right words spoken at the right time are of great value (Proverbs 25:11).
A sister always encountered difficulties in her home because she could not submit in words. She gave this testimony:
I encountered difficulties in my home because I could not control my tongue. I was so sharp-tongued that anytime my husband wanted to speak or correct me, I would end up quarrelling with him. There was no humility in me and I knew it was the cause of so many problems in our home.
While coming for the 1994 Women convention, I decided that I needed a practical solution. As the woman of God ministered, I desired the same spirit of humility and submission at work in her. I then decided that like the woman with the issue of blood touched Jesus’ garment and was made whole, I would touch the woman of God and receive my heart’s desire.
After the ministration, I went forward to the altar and embraced Mummy Oyedepo, and she said to me, ‘It is well.’ That was it! All became well with my life, and my tongue received a touch. My husband noticed that a new life had emerged in me…
This text is an extract from the book “MAKING MARRIAGE WORK” written by Faith A. Oyedepo.
We invite you to read the following article “UNDERSTANDING MALE/ FEMALE DIFFERENCES“.
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