Physical contact holds tremendous emotional power. It is a way to express your love through affectionate gestures. This can include:

• A gentle caress,
• Holding your partner’s hand while pacing around,
• Hugging or wrapping your arms around their waist,
• Kissing them,
• Engaging in sexual intimacy,
• Running your fingers through their hair.

By using these expressions of love, you will fill their emotional tank. If you have not yet identified which love language speaks to them most, one clue is to pay attention to their complaints or comments directed at you. For instance, if you hear phrases like:

• “You mean you didn’t bring me anything?”, this shows your partner expects to receive gifts from you.
• “You no longer have time for me; we don’t share anything anymore,” they desire to spend meaningful and unforgettable moments with you.
• “No one ever touches me in this house, what have I done to deserve this?”, implies your partner longs for more physical touch.
• “You’re always criticizing me, always pointing out my faults,” “You never appreciate anything I do,” in this case, your partner expects you to say uplifting and affirming words.
• “If you loved me, you wouldn’t just sit there doing nothing. You’d be helping me.” Here, your spouse is asking for acts of service.

Don’t hesitate to respond by practicing your partner’s love language, or else you risk driving them away. In fact, many people who failed to adapt to their partner’s emotional needs have pushed them into the arms of strangers who could fulfill them — and such situations are deeply regrettable.

Let us note that none of these expressions of love can be conveyed properly if their source is filled with negativity. You can only give what you have received, and no bitter or hardened heart can offer affirming words, render acts of service, give meaningful gifts, desire quality time, or physically touch their partner in a loving way. The root cause of many divorces is this lack of effective communication, often stemming from the hardness of heart in either the man or the woman.

So let us pray that God may give us a circumcised heart — gentle, peaceful, humble, simple, and full of love…

This text is an excerpt from the book “MYDUMAR: THE MYSTERY OF MARRIAGE” written by Rev. Blaise KANGA.

We invite you to read the following article: “THE ELECTRONIC NIGHT HUSBAND?”

PHYSICAL TOUCH.