You know the proverb that says “silence is golden”? Know that it’s one of men’s favorite statements. Silence is precious because it brings peace. At times, silence speaks more and better than words. It’s sometimes difficult for a wife to understand that her husband can remain in the same room with her without speaking to her, and without there being any problem between them. And this moment in the presence of his wife will be greatly appreciated by the husband.

But often very poorly perceived by the wife who often associates his silence with the existence of a problem.

Several years ago, we went on vacation with a couple of friends for a week in the south of France (it was before we became parents because if we were to do it again today, we wouldn’t be four anymore but eleven…). While our wives Nadine and Marie-Ange were chatting comfortably inside the apartment with moments of laughter, Luka and I experienced one of the most memorable moments of our vacation. We were both on the balcony, each lying on our terrace chair, book in hand, with only the sound of birdsong and the timid traffic of a few passers-by. For over an hour, the only exchange we had was like: “Bro, everything okay?”, “Yeah, chill”, “Cool!”. What a magnificent moment!

Men detest quarrels and disputes. They love peace, and their home should be a haven of peace. And the heart of your home is you, dear wife! You are the one who influences your home to either turn it into an Eden on earth or a place of torment for your family and your husband in particular.

“It is better to dwell in a desert land than with a contentious and vexatious woman.” Proverbs 21:19

So, if you want your husband to function normally, never, never, NEVER… shout at him! Apostle Yvan CASTANOU puts it this way:

“In every man, there is a fool and a king. The one who responds to you is the one you are addressing!“

Be wise! Speak with respect and honor to the king who resides in your husband.

“For so in former times the holy women also, who hoped in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection to their own husbands: as Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord: whose daughters ye now are, if ye do well, and are not put in fear by any terror.” 1 Peter 3:5-6

When your husband feels that you maintain a permanent tension in your home, supported by your words, your criticisms, and your constant remarks, he will perceive it as a lack of respect towards him as the head of the household. Even if your words are motivated by your love for him, he will only remember its disrespectful aspect. In such a situation, know that even if you are right, he will resist you. Learn to restrain yourself and find the right moment, the right way, and then the right tone to convey your message…

This text is an excerpt from the book “Love it and Respect it” written by Teddy NGBANDA.

We invite you to read the following article “YOUR HUSBAND IS NOT AS EMOTIONALLY GIFTED AS YOU“.