The insecure mentor is filled with insecurities. They help you but never truly value you. They fear you might surpass them. With such a mentor, one must be careful not to violate the first law of power outlined in Robert Greene’s book “The 48 Laws of Power“, which states: never outshine the master.

This type of mentor struggles with insecurity: they lack self-confidence and carry a deep inferiority complex. They fought hard to reach the top and will do anything to maintain their position. They are even willing to cut down anyone who threatens to take their throne. Such individuals fear those who might surpass them.

As a result, this mentor will offer you only crumbs from their knowledge and experience. Let me share a personal example. I once attended a church with my wife, where the pastor was an excellent teacher. One day, he made a statement that shocked everyone in the congregation, especially my wife and me.

In the prophetic realm, we looked up to him as a mentor. Yet, he openly declared that he would not teach us deep things for fear that we might surpass him. He said, “Do you think I’d teach you profound things so you can surpass me?” That day, I realized my wife and I were under poor leadership, and we decided to stop pursuing the relationship further.

For years, he only taught us basic concepts, keeping us in a state of misunderstanding to ensure we wouldn’t surpass him. However, the role of a mentor is to develop leaders who will eventually surpass them. Your success as a mentor is measured by the influence of those you train. Unfortunately, this type of mentor seeks to limit you.

I recall another incident with the same mentor. At one point, I received a conviction from the Lord about multiplying myself. I had a vision of having three children, representing three individuals resembling me. I called the mentor to seek clarity on the dream. He replied, “You’re asking me such a question? I don’t know how to answer you. Go read the Bible!”

This was his constant response: “Go read the Bible!” He was reluctant to engage with me or provide meaningful guidance. I later realized he had nothing substantial to offer and deliberately withheld deeper insights. He likely understood that God was asking me to multiply myself and that I was reaching a level where I could develop others and grow. Sadly, he didn’t want me to reach that stage.

After hanging up, I felt terrible. I heard God’s voice saying, “I didn’t tell you to call him.” There are things God reveals to you that you must keep to yourself. This is why, through this book, I urge people to be selective, discreet, and prudent about what they share, even with leaders, mentors, or pastors.

Later, I had a profound prophetic dream in which my wife and I were to be ordained into our apostolic and prophetic dimensions. This mentor refused to do it. In the dream, I found myself in Cameroon, where someone else ordained us, as God had planned.

When the mentor learned of our ordination, he was furious, questioning, “Who dared to ordain them? Why were they ordained?” He had refused to do it himself and didn’t want anyone else to do it either. This attitude was evident in how he managed the church, which stagnated as a result. People came and left without receiving substantial spiritual nourishment.

Unfortunately, such mentors exist. Sometimes, their behavior reflects a deep, unresolved wound. They never share critical insights and only offer the basics to keep you at a lower level, ensuring you never surpass them. But if you don’t empower others to surpass you, you’ll end up working tirelessly.

Refusing to delegate or train others to take your place means you’ll never be able to take a vacation. This mentor was constantly exhausted and angry because he tried to manage everything himself. While he was a talented teacher, he was not a good leader.

Interestingly, when he wasn’t at church and others took over teaching, there was joy, and everyone was happy. But as soon as he returned, the mood shifted to sadness.

I’ve encountered other mentors of this kind. Among insecure mentors, there are those who use fear and guilt because they can’t understand how God could bestow so much potential and grace on someone so young. I recall one who often said to me, “Be careful. God gave you a great house, but He can take it away.”

In truth, this person was simply afraid because they sensed we might achieve greater things than they did. With such mentors, it’s best not to flaunt your knowledge. Stay humble in their presence. Act ignorant. Give the impression that you entirely depend on them for your growth so they don’t feel threatened.

This type of mentor also dislikes highly intelligent and multi-talented individuals, seeing them as a nightmare. Therefore, act with caution…

This text is an excerpt from the book “THE POWER OF A MENTOR“ written by WILLIAM DJAMEN.

We invite you to read the article, “WHAT IS A MENTOR?”

THE INSECURE MENTOR. THE INSECURE MENTOR. THE INSECURE MENTOR.