The most common remedy for premature ejaculation is for the husband to avoid unnecessary friction on the head of the penis immediately after penetration. This requires significant self-discipline, as at this point of arousal, his instinct urges him toward deep thrusting. This instinctive action is a natural method for depositing male sperm deep in the vagina, where it has the best chance of fertilizing the female egg.

However, this seemingly universal instinct is not the best method for achieving female satisfaction, as recent studies indicate that it may actually work against it. Women tend to respond more to very gentle movements than to deep thrusts.

Some women, for example, find that their tension buildup decreases when their husband begins thrusting but resumes when he slows down and moves side to side. If she develops her PC muscles, she can actually reach orgasm by contracting these muscles several times around his still penis.

Therefore, if the husband remains still for about two minutes immediately after entry, he will gain a degree of control that will delay his ejaculation. If the woman contracts her PC muscles around his penis during this period of stillness, her emotional tension will increase toward orgasm while his remains dormant. Then, when the husband has regained control over his ejaculation, they can begin thrusting toward mutual orgasm.

It is also helpful for the husband to avoid forceful, aggressive penetration and to remember that the first five to seven centimeters inside the vagina are the primary sensitive area for his wife. Once the penis goes beyond this point, it can become uncomfortable for the woman rather than stimulating. Men tend to think that deep thrusts excite their wives because they are exciting to them, but this is generally untrue unless they simultaneously use other gentler movements that stimulate the woman’s clitoral area.

Focusing their movements closer to the vaginal opening thus has two advantages over deep penetration: it is more exciting for the woman and less stimulating for the husband, helping him control his ejaculation as she heads toward orgasm.

A husband’s reaction to this suggestion is quite typical: “I thought it was essential for my penis to maintain close contact with the clitoris.” Although the clitoris is the most sexually sensitive organ, the first three centimeters of the vagina contain sensitive tissues, and this position also continues the friction and pulling of structures against the clitoris.

This method uses both sensitive zones together. Another advantage is that when the husband realizes he is approaching his point of no return, he can easily withdraw momentarily, continue stimulating the clitoris and caressing his wife in other ways, and reinsert his penis once he regains control. If he is deeply thrusting when the point of “no return” is reached, the friction from withdrawal may trigger his ejaculation.

The focus required to master this technique—allowing the husband to gain the control needed while increasing the wife’s tension through muscular squeezing of the still penis—is greatly rewarding in terms of mutual pleasure. Most men struggle to remain still for a full two minutes at this level of excitement.

Once he is inside the vagina, a man’s instinct demands movement, but he must resist this urge until he gains self-mastery. After the first period of stillness, the husband can experiment with how long subsequent pauses are needed to control ejaculation, but this technique can help him learn to delay his ejaculation almost indefinitely.

In some tests, men reported being able to control themselves for over two hours, though this is rarely necessary to satisfy a wife. In May 1994, a report presented at the American Urological Association meeting in San Francisco indicated that medical help is available for men facing premature ejaculation.

According to an article in US News and World Report (June 26, 1995), in a study of fifteen couples aged twenty-three to fifty-six, clomipramine delayed ejaculation up to five times. If this is accurate, any man suffering from premature ejaculation should consult his urologist.

Delayed Ejaculation

The opposite of premature ejaculation is the issue faced by a man who has no trouble maintaining an erection but is unable to ejaculate. This can be frustrating for both husband and wife. Although the wife of such a man may have no difficulty reaching orgasm (some women experience as many as four or five in a single session), she ends up exhausted, and he is left frustrated.

This form of sexual dysfunction may result from several factors, including fear of pregnancy due to uncertainty about contraception methods used and guilt from premarital promiscuity. This issue is rare.

When a man reaches his sixties or seventies, he may not ejaculate with every sexual encounter, but doctors reassure us that this is normal. Both partners should understand this and simply enjoy each sexual encounter without feeling pressured to force an orgasm every time.

This text is an excerpt from the book The Act of Marriage: The Beauty of Sexual Love written by Tim and Beverly LaHaye.

We invite you to read the following article: “THE HUSBAND IS THE KEY.

Comments (0)


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

EUREuro