Like a big sister facing a young woman or a young man who opens his heart to her. This is what I would tell him when he asked me these questions.

Question 1: My friends make fun of me because I’m still a virgin, what should I do?

Answer: My Beautiful, Virginity is a precious treasure that is not given lightly and to any man, it is given to a person who has honored you, that is to say your partner of life, your future husband. You are special, and your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, continue to preserve it. Don’t let yourself be corrupted by what others think. If your friends cannot respect your choice of life, so noble and rare, then you should change friends.

Question 2: My boyfriend threatens to leave me if I don’t have sex with him. I don’t know what to do, I’m afraid of losing him…

Answer: My dear, if he really loves you, he would understand your choice and won’t have too much trouble waiting. If it’s important to you, and if he loves you like he says it does, it should be important to him too. It is better to have present pain than future regret. If he doesn’t understand, then he’s just not the right person for you. You have your whole life ahead of you. Don’t worry, it will pass and you will meet someone with whom you will not have to sell out your values, become another person to be loved.

Question 3: I am young, beautiful, why does my mother refuse to let me dress sexy like the others…

Answer: Is your mother the parent of the other girls? You are his daughter and your success matters most to him. The way you dress sends a message whether you like it or not. What if I asked you what is the first impression you want others to have of you? You certainly wouldn’t want to be mistaken for someone you’re not, right? Like a girl of poor education, with loose morals for example. You are more than your body and your clothes. I would like you to highlight your human qualities and your achievements first. I could show you how to dress, be sexy, especially decent class without getting naked.

Question 4: I want to accept his marriage proposal because he takes good care of me and my family, he will get us out of poverty, my older brother doesn’t agree, how can I convince him?

Answer: ah girl, a lot of people get divorced because they got married for the wrong reasons. You don’t get married to escape poverty. Anything can happen, this man can lose all those things you want to marry him for. When that happens, will you be ready to support him and stay? Calm down a little. Try talking to your older brother again to understand and consider his point of view. Take a step back, invite the divine, take another moment of reflection before deciding. Above all, really prepare yourself before saying yes.

Questions 5: I thought he loved me and now that I got pregnant, he abandoned me with the child, I want to abort… Help me!

Answer: I understand your disappointment and right now you are so confused it feels like the sky is falling. Every decision you make during your youth has very serious consequences, like having an abortion. Are you ready to live with the guilt, the regret, if you decide to abort despite all the advice to dissuade you? Etc. Take a step back and think carefully, consider all the contours before making a decision. I am here no matter what and I will respect your decision, and I will support you even if I don’t agree because I know how hard it can be to live with.

Questions 6: I’m addicted to drugs, I don’t know how to get out of it, help me?

Answer: I’m so sorry you’re going through this. It was a mistake to have succumbed the first time, but you are not a mistake. I would like you to know that it is possible to overcome this addiction. I know a specialist who can help you get through this stage and get back to your previous fulfilling life. When you are ready, we will meet her together. We will find a solution and I will support you every step of the way.

Questions 7: I have been masturbating since the age of 15, it weighs on me and I am ashamed of myself, what should I do?

Answer: I’m really sorry to hear that. You are at an age where people will tell you that there is no harm in knowing your body…Sometimes, masturbating can hide deep discomfort. I would like you to trust me, we can look together at what really motivates you to do it together. If necessary, spiritual help will be found, don’t worry you will get through it. You’ve already taken a big step.

Questions 8: I would love to be famous like her, plus she has a good family and her parents are rich, they support her, pff my life disgusts me…

Answer: I didn’t know you were so unhappy. If you don’t learn very quickly to love yourself as you are and be content with what you have, you will remain unhappy. Envy is a source of suffering, and I don’t wish that on you. You will never be as beautiful, famous, known as the other because you are not her. There will be someone better than you somewhere, there will also be someone who admires you, for whom you can be a model. Don’t worry, your time to shine will come, in the meantime do your classes well…

This text is an extract from the book “INFLUENCED OR INFLUENCER” written by Suzanne KWEDI.
We invite you to read the following article “The Youth Challenges of the 21st Century”.