The Sister Single for Life is in her forties, a long-time devout Christian who wholeheartedly serves the Lord with unwavering determination. Her lifelong desire has been to serve the Lord every day of her life, firmly believing that she is not meant for marriage due to the overwhelming call of her service to the Lord.

Apostle Paul’s Advice to the Sister Single for Life

It’s rare to find sisters who make the decision to be a Sister Single for Life. This decision is entirely biblical, as confirmed by 1 Corinthians 7:7: “I wish that all of you were as I am. But each of you has your own gift from God; one has this gift, another has that.” However, when making such a decision, it’s crucial to ensure that it’s not driven by emotional or spiritual issues but stems from a pure heart, inspired by the Holy Spirit.

Moreover, in choosing to remain single for life, it’s essential to understand that you will face several challenges:

1. Loneliness: You’ll particularly notice this during the holiday season when people gather with their families, but you might find yourself alone.
2. Losing Friends: If you have friends from your peer group who are already married, maintaining relationships with some of them may be challenging as your interests may diverge. When they discuss children, spouses, and in-laws, you might not share the same enthusiasm, and vice versa. Also, if you had male friends who got married, your closeness may be viewed differently.
3. Societal Stigma: In our society, singles can sometimes face disdain. The notion that a single person has failed in life is still prevalent in certain cultures, particularly those of African origin. You may have to deal with a certain level of social stigma. I remember Geraldine and Pascaline, two single Christian women in their thirties, who always found themselves placed at “lesser” tables during gatherings.
4. Jealousy: Some married women may be jealous and make it clear that you should not get too close to their husbands. I recall the story of a single sister who was berated by a married sister for borrowing her husband’s phone for a church-related task. If you have a striking appearance, you might be even more subject to suspicion, so it’s essential to be cautious in your interactions with married men to avoid any misunderstandings.
5. Close Work with Christian Men: In your church service, you will be closely working with fervent Christian men who love the Lord and are compassionate towards others. You should guard your heart to avoid engaging in inappropriate relationships.
6. Suppressing Desires: You will need to restrain your desires to maintain purity and holiness.

Given the challenges of a single life, I believe the decision to remain single for life should be made with the guidance of the Holy Spirit, rather than relying solely on your own strength. However, there is a wonderful promise made by God to those who are eunuchs for His sake, as found in Isaiah 56:3-5: “Let no foreigner who is bound to the Lord say, ‘The Lord will surely exclude me from his people.’ And let no eunuch complain, ‘I am only a dry tree.’ For this is what the Lord says: ‘To the eunuchs who keep my Sabbaths, who choose what pleases me and hold fast to my covenant – to them I will give within my temple and its walls a memorial and a name better than sons and daughters; I will give them an everlasting name that will endure forever.’“

Let’s Pray Together

Father, I want to make You my delight, love You above all, and prioritize You in all my decisions and choices regarding my romantic life. Guide me in all my decisions, and if You call me to remain single, I thank You for the strength and grace You provide to navigate this life. In Jesus’ name, Amen!

This text is an excerpt from the book “God where is my Boaz? ” authored by Francine Cheumbou.