I would like to remind you of the definition of the word “engagement”: a solemn promise exchanged between future spouses. God is a God of order. He did not give marriage and then engagements, but engagements and then marriage.

Isaac led Rebecca into the tent of his mother Sarah; he took Rebecca as his wife, and he loved her. So, Isaac was comforted after losing his mother. Genesis chapter 24, verse 67.

In this passage from the Bible, God wants to show us that Isaac did not behave wrongly towards Rebecca. He married Rebecca, and then she became pregnant. She did not have children before marriage. The passage that specifies that Isaac led Rebecca into the tent suggests that it was the time of the engagement.

God makes all things good in His time, and everything He does, He knows exactly why He does it. Nowadays, more and more people, even in our churches, do things in reverse: engagements are becoming more and more trivialized, almost rushed.

Look at how many young people engage in impurity during engagements. Some young women even get pregnant during engagements. Since this is frowned upon in our churches and condemned by the Word of God, some may choose to have an abortion rather than taking responsibility for their actions.

My book talks about the value of women, and I cannot discuss engagements without addressing a topic dear to my heart: “chastity.” Dear reader, during engagements, you should not yet give your body to your fiancé. Doing so devalues yourself and diminishes your worth. One of the things that gives value to a woman is her chastity. Even though, nowadays, this word is becoming rare, I insist on emphasizing the possibility of saying “no” to sexual relations before being honored by your future husband.

You must take the time to seek God in His Word, in prayer. God does not take engagements lightly because, to Him, this commitment is like marriage. Joseph, her husband, who was a just man and did not want to disgrace her, decided to divorce her secretly. Matthew chapter 1, verse 19.

This shows that God views engagements as the beginning of marriage, as Joseph was not yet married to Mary, and he referred to her as “Joseph, her husband.”

Stop believing it’s like in Hollywood, where a man gets down on one knee in a mall in front of everyone with a beautiful ring. Engagements are a commitment not only to the person you will marry but also to God and the family.

Take this commitment seriously. Many women suffer because a man left them, victims of their poor choices. Do things according to God, not according to people.

It is a trap for a person to take a sacred commitment lightly and only reflect on it after making a vow. Proverbs chapter 20, verse 25.

Many people ignore the hidden consequences behind the trivialization of engagements. Unfortunately, they do not take them seriously. Let me remind you that, spiritually, emotionally, or physically, breaking an engagement without valid reasons can have severe consequences.

Spiritually, such a commitment, not taken seriously, can become an entry point for curses, blockages, a succession of misfortunes. Suppose a man trusted you, gave you everything, and on the eve of the wedding, you decide to abandon him without valid reasons, even though you gave him your word. Every time that man suffers, he will speak curses against your life. This will affect you unless you have made peace with him, offered your apologies, and repented before God. The Bible, in Proverbs chapter 26, verse 2, says: “A curse without cause shall not alight.” However, in your case, there is indeed a cause that will make you subject to this curse.

Many people ask me how to recognize the right person once they are in a relationship, and others who have not yet engaged wonder how to find the right person. I will provide some insights that can help you.

Allow me to tell you this truth: when you come across the right person, you will know it. To the question, “How do I know if it’s the right person?” I suggest you ask yourself another question: “How can I be a good person for someone? Am I a good person for someone?” Instead of focusing on what the other person can offer you, focus on what you can offer them. Unknowingly, you will naturally attract the person who is right for you.

Instead of entering marriage with the idea of receiving, you should enter with the idea of giving. If everyone came into marriage with the intention of giving and selflessly committing to the other, imagine how successful marriages would be.

First, it is advisable to write in a journal the type of spouse you would like to marry, the criteria… Once you have defined these criteria, it will be easier to recognize your future spouse. It is very important to consider all these points…

This text is from the book “The Value of Women ” written by AZANLEDJI CELIA.